I have nothing against you. In fact, you were probably one of the nicest people I have ever met. You were the school counselor in my elementary school and you helped me through a tough time. I will always remember being pulled out of class to go to "therapy" in your tiny room by the main office. There was literally a table with five chairs, a bookshelf with games on it, and then a tiny TV in the corner. There wasn't much room to move around but it was our place to let loose. Three other kids would join me and we'd sit and talk for what seemed like hours. I'm sure it wasn't hours since we still had to go to class and such, but that's what it felt like.
My mom had me taken out of class I think twice a week to go and talk to you. What was going on in my life was to be kept a secret from everyone else but you and two of my classmates. We swore into secrecy to not let whatever was said in your tiny room be repeated. My mom told me that it wasn't right for me to talk about how my dad liked the same sex. I also couldn't talk about how my parents were getting a divorce. I remember multiple sessions were to make sure that we all knew that it wasn't our fault that our parents were splitting up. I don't really recall us talking a lot though. It was mostly just us kids playing games or watching movies to help us cope through our tough times.
I remember one time the tiny group of divorced parents and I played Jumanji which was a lot of fun. If we got "sucked into the board" we would hide underneath the table. I'm pretty sure we made a lot of animal noises too. That was a lot of fun. I also remember eating mini doughnuts every time we had to talk about our home lives. We would each stack up on as many as we possibly could. There were hardly any powdered doughnuts compared to the chocolate kind. We would all put the powder up to our lips to make them white and make kissy faces. How silly is that?
You had us keep journals and we were supposed to write in them every night. I don't really remember what I wrote in mine, but I do recall drawing pictures of my broken family. That always made me sad. Every time we met we would share what we wrote. It was a good way to get things off of our little chests. You would smile at us and congratulate each of us for being so brave to talk about home. But before we would read, you would point to your feelings chart. To get us to relax a bit you would have us pretend to feel each emotion. There was a picture of a cartoon making each face underneath each feeling. Then we would say which ones fit how we were feeling inside. Yet another good way to get us to open up.
There is yet another memory that pops into my brain when I think of visiting you: tiny suckers. You went into your office next to your tiny room one day to make a few phone calls. We were left with crayons and a big sheet of paper to draw our feelings. You left a big box of suckers in the middle of our table. We drew on our papers for a tiny bit before shoving our hands into the box of sweetness. A bet was made between the four of us who were in our small space: whoever could keep a popcorn flavored sucker in their mouth the longest won. We each found a popcorn sucker and counted down from five to start the bet. Within a few seconds two girls dropped out. I won the bet against the only boy in our group. I didn't win anything physical, just the satisfaction that I could keep that disgusting thing in my mouth the longest. Oh the silly things we do when we're kids, hmm?
You helped me a lot, even if you don't believe it. I could always go to your office and talk to you. I did that a lot, remember? Since my mom worked at the school I would get there early and leave later so we had a few private talks. I really liked talking to you. We would even talk while I helped you decorate the hallways, made copies in the copy room, or ate food in the teacher's lounge. Not only did I see you as a therapist, I saw you as a friend. You stopped working at the elementary school soon after I left to go to middle school. I was sad when I found that out since you helped me so much. I bet you helped a lot of other kids though, too. Now you have kids of your own and they are beautiful and are going to elementary school. Where has the time gone? I think you even came to my Open House for my graduating high school. You will always be therapist #1, but you will always be remembered as my favorite out of all three. Thank you for helping me.
With great thanks and appreciation,
Samantha
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